01.10.10

The days are passing so quickly and yet the concept of dates on paper means so little to me these days. This one is interesting because it is rather binary. Dontcha.

I have been working. HA. Working. But it doesn't seem like working right now because it feels more like helping out some very loved family. And so the hours are not long, and the favors are not too big to ask and I will always say yes because I am safe here and it will always be ok. It is very different working for people who mean something to you. Ha ha! It is also full of trial and error. I am so passionate about things sometimes. They have to be PERFECT and RIGHT and I bump my head against the established business philosophy and the routine that has been in motion for much longer than I have been a part of it. I feel like I am out of line suggesting improvements to service and flow, and then at other times I am ready to fire someone for a minor infraction. I, however, have no power to hire or fire anyone so what right do I have getting indignant? None. But I shake my fists in the air nonetheless. And then I realize that it is just my job to help and that the more humble I am, the better everything will work. [Insert a little more fist shaking here] GRIN.

At home now after a brunch shift and I just fed the panthers so it smells like panther food in the house. The candles I lit are making no headway in masking the odeur. I bought a beer I don't like very much. I usually request that the bartender on duty suggest a flavorful option, but tonight I was on my own in a sea of micro-brews at the Whole Paycheck without a beer geek to help me out. It is amazing how the Craft Beer movement  has exploded in the last few years. Craft Food is gaining in popularity and force as well due to wonderful restaurants like those here in Milwaukee (Honeypie and Comet, Sala da Pranzo and Beans & Barley amongst others) who make it a point to purchase meats and produce from local farms and use high quality ingredients coupled with high class service in comfortable and affordable environments. This is one of the many reasons I love Milwaukee... and is one of the things I hope to be a part of in my life, if I am able to make a difference in  how people live. For the better.

As for India and travel plans, things are coming together slowly. I imagine that it will all happen at once. In one fell swoop I will book everything and pack my bags and be gone in a swirl of nervous energy and perfume (last chance to spritz with anything other than DEET for a while) and leave not much other than some really long blonde hairs and a sweater or two. And my heart? I am supposed to take my heart with me. It was left open and beaming almost a year ago when the object of my fire-hose style loving decided I was no longer needed and I decided that I WOULD NOT turn down the volume for anything. Enter the good children of LIFT who would infinitely benefit from it, far much more than any one man. And now here I am in Milwaukee and the quiet, uranium-like radiation by-product of my major focus has seeped into the home I am living in. For the first time in a year I am starting to feel attached, something I worked very hard not to feel for an unspecified time of transition. It makes me say "hm" and smoosh up my face into a grimace of quandry. Hm. HM.

And now I think I will do some writing with a pen instead of keys. Good night all, sweet dreams.